have you. >> jamal: i hope i'll come back on the other side of the table. >> yes, sir. >> dan thank you. >> yes, sir. >> phil and siprion, thank you as well. and if i did anything wrong in the words of my friend dennis rodman don't hate me just don't hate me. i'm jamal simmons this is the "bill press show," have a good day. >> guess what, don't hate me guess what don't hate me. ♪ >> announcer: this is the "bill press show."

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: hello tv world. happy monday morning. eric boehlert from media matters coming up. john fuglesang, sexy liberal and melissa fitzgerald, actress jacki, the third member of our truffle. hot brie. she, jim, is sleeping at my house. >> oh, really? >> do tell. >> stephanie: i know you picture naked pillow fights and all. guess what we did. we watched the replay of "meet the press" and talked [ bleep ] about david gregory. that's what we did. >> you're a little too scandalous today. that's what political geeks do. that was our naughty slumber party. >> she had just flown in from d.c. if i'm not mistaken.

>> she's moving to my hood! >> i've lost her to you. you have greater negotiating skills than i do. she moved out of my neighborhood and into yours. >> stephanie: you lost the turf war. >> seriously. >> stephanie: we'll talk about "meet the press." it is just a chiron. are both sides equally to blame for the sequester? [ screaming ] >> it is enough to make your head explode. >> stephanie: here she is, jacki schechner, fair and balanced in the current news center. >> president obama will make a few personnel announcements. he's expected to name myth scientist to head up the department of energy and gina mccarthy as the new head of the e.p.a. she comes from inside the agency. he's currently the assistant administrator. over the weekend a white house official said the president had selected sylvia as his next choice for budget chief. the foundation is a charitable organization with ties to walmart stars. >> jack lew was the last head of

the office of management and budget. he's just been confirmed as a treasury secretary. berwall served in the clinton administration but can be seen in the obama administration. all three will have to be confirmed by the senate. and secretary of state john kerry speaking at a press conference in saudi arabia today says we do not have an endless amount of time to negotiate with iran over its nuclear program. together with the saudi foreign minister, kerry warned syria's president asat, he must step down or the u.s. and allies will continue to up their support to the syrian rebel opposition. on what is now the 7th leg of a nine nation trip to europe and the middle east, john kerry's first, by the way as secretary of state he also -- palestinian president mahmoud abbas to talk about the responsibility of negotiations with israel over peace in the middle east. we're back after the break. stay with us.

billy zane stars in barabbas. coming in march to reelz. to find reelz in your area, go to reelz.com

>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ ♪ hey, all right now ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: mm-hmm, yes, it is. it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. six minutes after the hour. what a show we have. we have eric boehlert from media matters and right-wing world. jim, as i mentioned to jacki at the top of the hour, actress melissa fitzgerald, hot brie, is currently sleeping at my house. [ ding ding ] [ applause ] >> what is she wearing? >> stephanie: call her and find out. >> sushi pajamas. >> stephanie: it is not the

naughty kind of slumber party jim was hoping for. we watched "meet the press" and yelled at david gregory. yelling at the chiron are both sides equally to blame for the sequester. >> i was imagining a pillow fight with your bra and panties and feathers flying all over the place. >> no feathers in the pillows anymore. >> stephanie: just when we thought we had jumped -- the shark had jumped the screaming goats -- >> we've put a moratorium on screaming forget songs -- and george wrote, i know i'm late with this. perhaps the scream goat has jumped the shark. he sent one and listen to roger. ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ [ screaming ] ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ [ screaming ] ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪

[ screaming ] ♪ it's time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: that could be our monday version after "meet the press" because there's something david gregory says that -- only one man can help me now. >> what? it's monday. >> stephanie: it is all cattywampas. >> cattywampas mood, children. >> stephanie: good morning john fuglesang. >> john: three days without a pope and i've already gotten gay, married and used birth control. >> stephanie: hello, john fuglesang! >> john: good morning guys. welcome from freezing new york. >> stephanie: honey bunny rohland has told me it is awful. >> john: freezing wind. how the climate can change to upset us more. >> we had 80 degrees this weekend. >> stephanie: sorry about that. >> john: i was in asheville hanging out with stephanie's mom all weekend. i was in asheville. that's why i couldn't join you

on friday. >> stephanie: yes my mom -- there's too many hippies in asheville. she lives in charlotte. >> john: that's right. everywhere i went -- >> stephanie: oh, dear -- she's in the southern part, the republican part of charlotte. >> john: everywhere i went, i ran into big stephanie fans who loved our big show we did at the asheville civic center. >> stephanie: are you referring to the next one april 13th in chicago which is almost getting to the sold out point again. >> john: holy nonsecter batman! >> stephanie: john fuglesang has hung out with every beatle -- did you at one point hang out with every beatle? >> john: i was only a little kid when john died. >> stephanie: i wasn't sure. john has been a deejay since he was like 4 1/2. >> john: when vh-1 could still spell the word "music".

he died before i was playing. i handed a glass of water to ringo once. >> okay. >> stephanie: well, i hate -- funny you should ask me why i ask. because i -- you know, i hate to name drop. >> john: i know you hate that. >> stephanie: sting told -- >> john: how much you hate name-dropping. >> stephanie: however, guess who i got to hang out with saturday night. steven stills. >> john: he's pretty cool. >> stephanie: he's so awesome. i don't know what to say. i got to hear a new album. i think i touched a guitar that costs more than i'll never make in 17 lifetimes. should i not put my drink on that one? sorry. [ screaming ] >> did you know steven actually addition decisioned for the monkees -- actually auditioned for the monkees? >> stephanie: no. >> i got to hear him play.

>> stephanie: he's an amazing guy. >> john: he may have helped end the vietnam war and play live on wall street. >> stephanie: jim is a music dude. just to see the guitar, it was like wow. at any rate, so john fuglesang you have not been to florida recently. >> john:, no i have not. >> stephanie: as annoyed i am about david gregory and the sequester, at least i did not fall into a sinkhole. >> that is awful! >> stephanie: wow seriously? because i'm having a bad -- >> week -- >> life. >> stephanie: thank you. watching tv, his whole bed tv and dresser. >> looking at the house from outside, you would never know anything was wrong inside. >> from the air it is bad. >> if you're standing on the street, it looked fine. >> john: the house will be condemned. >> they started tearing it down yesterday. it is going to be his grave now

because they can't get him out. >> stephanie: it is horrible. i never even heard of such a thing. have you? >> oh, yeah. florida has sinkholes all the time. takes out whole neighborhoods. >> one more reason not to live in florida. >> stephanie: weird [ bleep ] in florida. >> it is limestone which is really soft and it can get washed away. >> on the plus side, it is hard to stand your grand when you're underwater. >> there's that. thanks jim. >> stephanie: granted -- >> john: the governor's going to allow medicare payments. >> stephanie: that's it. when we go back to bed here in california, there is a chance we could have an earthquake and get sucked into the earth. >> there's that. >> john: that's because you like living with an element of risk. >> stephanie: i like things edgy. >> john: it is like earthquakes in california are like cockroaches in new york. first time i had one happen in l.a., i was like oh, my god. five years later another

earthquake. rent's due. it's like cockroaches first time ahh! >> stephanie: i lived in new york. every once in awhile, something you could ride in the kentucky derby would come out from under my sink. >> and there is an earthquake fault under manhattan too. >> stephanie: good news for you, john. >> and you have the freezing weather. >> if i'm leaving for an extended period, like three years -- >> stephanie: we'll know we're screwed. thanks for the heads up, jim. john fuglesang ezra klein has something in the post. this is why obama can't make a deal with the republicans. i thought my head was going to explode when i saw the chiron. this is the starting point. are both sides equally to blame for the sequester? >> john: one side is more to blame for really thinking lucy wasn't going to pull back the football this time. to be fair. we can be very, very fair. the white house -- >> stephanie: what would you have had the president do?

>> john: i think this president is afraid of using executive orders. >> stephanie: how is he going to do that with a budget? >> john: with a budget? i didn't say with a budget. >> stephanie: i'm talking about with this particular situation. >> john: if he's guilty of overplaying his hand, they're going to use this to bludgeon him for the next year and a half. if things don't go bad because of the cuts, he got caught in a fib. he said the folks who work in the capitol will get pay cuts starting monday. it's not true. they're using it to bludgeon him this morning. >> stephanie: that makes it entirely his fault. >> john: no but they're going to use that to completely hit this president so hard and say the sequester wasn't a big deal and when the actual cuts happen and eight of the top ten states to be hurt by the sequester will be red states, they'll turn around blame it on the black guy. you know they will. >> i think you're right john. [ ♪ battle hymn of republic ♪ ] >> stephanie: let's go to ezra

klein. ezra klein writes file this under jonathan tate is right. my col sum about the carbon comically poor lines of communication between the white house and the hill. a respected republican legislator thought it would be a game changer for president obama to say he would be open to cut cpi. the only problem, obama has said he's open to change cpi as part of a budget deal and this isn't one of the times when the admission was in private. we're going off his web site. it is in bold type. they had no idea that beam made concession. if they could inform him of this budget offer, he would come up with something. the taxes are awful. they can't trust obama to carry them out or something. if you saw boehner yesterday on "meet the press" -- >> john: what a lying sack of crap stephanie. here's the thing -- >> stephanie: let me finish because i think this is really

important because again the mainstream media gets sucked into this. technically, obama did move first on spending. obama signed into law a set of bills that cut $1.8 trillion from discretionary spending including no tax increases at all. one of the bills the budget control act gave us the sequester so you could argue they included closer to $3 trillion in spending cuts without a single tax increase. it didn't seem to move trust. so far the republicans haven't proposed any further tax increases but obama has proposed quite a few spending cuts including medicare. >> john: and raising the medicare age. >> stephanie: the bottom line is republicans won't agree to further tax increases so there's no deal to be had. he goes on to say the truth comes out. republicans won't make a deal that includes further taxes. they want to get the white house to implement their agenda in return for nothing. there's no deal even if obama agrees to demands there is no deal because republicans don't want to make a deal that

includes taxes no matter what they get in return for it. the interesting question is whether the possibility of a government shutdown, a debt ceiling breach or the pressure of the sequester's cuts will, in the coming months break one side or the other but as long as the g.o.p.'s position is they won't compromise, there won't be a compromise. ezra klein is nailing it. >> or as you call him -- >> erza klein. >> john: we're allowed to be disappointed in the president for saying stuff that might come back to haunt him. >> stephanie: i don't think he ever thought this would happen. >> john: i don't think he thought this would happen. i thought he thought lucy was going to bet him kick the ball this time. this is about raising the debt ceiling. they did for ronald reagan for a total of 189% increase. they did it for george bush over ten times. >> stephanie: boner -- the idea of the president. john, excuse me. the president didn't want to be inconvenienced by the entire economy of the united states

crashing down because we default? the way david gregory -- he got a few questions in, john but the way he let him spin it was incredible. >> john: i agree. >> i think you need to switch to abc's "this week with george stephanopoulos." >> watch bob schieffer. >> that's a little more soothing. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] >> stephanie: okay. >> john: if i was david gregory's wife, i would cheat on the man because he doesn't ask follow-up questions. it was so disgusting it was john boehner who pushed this sequester through the house. john boehner who twisted so many republican arms so they would agree to vote for the sequester and now he's blaming the whole thing on the president. i almost think they launched it as a trap for the president. >> stephanie: gotta take a break. 18 minutes after the hour. we continue fridays with fuglesang on "the stephanie miller show." >> more of our share of the negativism. >> announcer: it's "the stephanie miller show."

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i think the number one thing that viewers like about the young turks is that we're honest. they can question whether i'm right, but i think that the audience gets that this guy, to the best of his ability, is trying to look out for us.

>> stephanie miller. ♪ get off ♪ >> that song is annoying. >> stephanie: 23 minutes after the hour. so melissa and i have a question for you, jim. we were watching john boehner on "meet the press." i decided he has a distinct lisp. >> of course he has a lisp. >> you're despicable! >> stephanie: that's what melissa said. we were watching him.

he does this weird lizard thing with his tongue. >> it is the president's idea. >> that's despicable! >> stephanie: play some. it was just very distinct yesterday on "meet the press." the lizard tongue and the lisp. here we go. >> as i told the president once again yesterday, we all know what the problem is. we've got -- >> a plaque guy in the white house. >> that's not what he said, jim. >> stephanie: jim's impressions are so good, people think that's what they said. >> sylvester. >> not the gay one. >> stephanie: you little scamp you. >> i think it was cotton mouth. cigarettes and bourbon.

needs to hydrate. >> stephanie: pictures of him. his eyes look like -- >> googly eyes. >> stephanie: shift something. >> or he has little spirals in his eyes. tweety birds flying around his head. >> the president needs to take responsibility for stuff like this. >> i've made it clear to the president, he got a trillion dollars worth of tax hikes in obamacare. and another tax hikes on january 1st. you can't tax our way out of this problem. >> and david gregory said what? >> stephanie: david gregory said what now? [ crickets chirping ] >> john: can we talk about how dishonest that is? that the president got his tax hike. there were no tax hikes. tax hikes are still lower than they were when president bush took office. over 80% -- he's trying to close

tax loopholes the same thing romney ran on. they're lying about obama again. >> stephanie: he used the same condescending tone that he does about the president with david gregory. he was like david now david! be listen to me. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: it was a very pronounced lisp yesterday. >> this discussion about revenue, in my view, is over. it is about taking it on the spending problem here in washington. >> there is no spending problem. >> there is no spending problem. >> there is no spending problem. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] >> stephanie: i'm sorry. there's no place like the house. the other thing i noticed -- [ ♪ "jeopardy" theme ♪ ] you know what's weird about house speakers or leaders? what do i notice on "meet the press"? because it was a long shot of him and david gregory sitting there? he has teeny, tiny feet about tom delay. something about republican leaders -- his feet are --

>> they're size six feet. >> stephanie: his feet are too small for his large body. >> it makes him look like a bowling pin. >> stephanie: that's why they were seated. he would fall over. >> john: that means nothing. i think small feet means nothing. don't read into that at all. i bet my size 13 shoes on it. >> are you really size 13? >> i am. >> stephanie: no wonder you have such a large baby. lee in las vegas you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: hi, steph. i think you're great. >> stephanie: thank you. >> caller: i want to let you know i think john boner everything that comes out of his false is -- comes out of his mouth is false. why does this guy constantly lie? he lies. he said that president obama doesn't put anything on the table. he doesn't say anything. he doesn't do this. he doesn't do that. meanwhile, everything he tries to do, they say no to. >> stephanie: did you see how -- did you see what i was talking about lee.

he said the president didn't want to be inconvenienced with another vote on the debt ceiling because for the first time in history, we're taking the debt ceiling a hostage in our country because the president actually cared about the country and you didn't. >> he's doing what the country wants, stephanie. that's what he ran on. he wants to close some tax loopholes for the extraordinarily rich. 3/4 of a million jobs to be lost and they're laughing about it saying oh, my god if they didn't lose it in the first day -- he said it will take two or three weeks for it to go into effect. they don't listen. >> stephanie: they're just playing gotcha with things. and i do think lee the president didn't think this was going to happen. that was the gotcha tape that the sequester isn't going to happen. >> caller: gregory is too soft. they need somebody like you steph. >> stephanie: that's right.

i just lost the job just like that to dade gregory. >> john: it was you and him right? [ applause ] >> i like how he said either you or your staff. what? >> stephanie: what? >> no. >> stephanie: he did actually -- john, he did ask things that resembled questions but then he lets it go. he lets boner lie and then it's like okay. >> john: he asks a tough question. boehner dodges it. he asks another question and boehner dodges it. he drops it. even if you're frustrated with the president if he happened to trust the republicans the guys lied. david gregory didn't hold their feet to the fire. >> stephanie: right back after this break on "the stephanie miller show." one thing viewers like about the young turks is that we're honest. i think the audience gets that i actually mean it. michael shure: this show is about being up to date so a lot of my work happens by doing the

things that i am given to doing anyway. joy behar: you can say anything here. jerry springer: i spent a couple of hours with a hooker joy behar: your mistake was writing a check jerry springer: she never cashed it (vo) the day's events. four very unique points of view. tonight starting at 6 eastern.

>> stephanie miller. >> at least the jackass is out of bed. >> stephanie: it is the "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 34 minutes after the hour. it is mondays with fuglesang. >> what? >> stephanie: just deal with it. hello, john fuglesang. good morning. >> john: good morning ms. miller, so nice to be with you. >> stephanie: ann romney blames the media for -- i've missed her warmth, haven't you? >> stop it! >> ann: stop it. this is hard. you want to try it, you get in the ring. this is hard! >> the media came up with a story that obama was winning. [ cuckoo clock chimes ] >> stephanie: they were on fox news sunday.

let's do this. blame the media sound byte. >> john: they came on fox news sunday, saw the shadow and there's four more years of obama. >> there were reports that you and your son tagg were frustrated with the obama campaign that they didn't let mitt be mitt. they didn't let him show his open, compassionate side. >> well, of course, it is partly true but it was not just the campaign's fault. i believe it was the media's fault. is that he was not being given a fair shake. people weren't allowed to see him for who he was. >> what about the media? >> i'm happy to blame the media. [ laughter ] >> mitt romney showed his real self on that video. >> stephanie: that was the problem with the campaign. too much of mitt romney. >> it is the media's fault that romney called it a tax and free stuff in the same speech. >> stephanie: they didn't let

mitt be mitt. no, we got it. we saw him! we saw the real mitt. >> 47% of moochers. >> john: they made mitt act far more to the right than he was comfortable being for months and months. >> do you think the two of you contributed to this image which the other side made up that you were so wealthy that you were somehow out of touch with the average american? >> you know, that's a reality that you know, you can't change. we are who we are. the thing that was frustrating to me is that people didn't really get to know mitt for who he was. >> oh, yeah, we did. >> stephanie: we got it. we're all good. >> cell phone video. all you need to know. >> stephanie: mitt romney says it kills him he's not president. but he does not blame super storm sandy new jersey governor chris christie on his way to his loss to president obama except his failure to connect with voters. >> the media is so unfair. >> john: when you consider the

fact that the mainstream media never got tough on him until the etch-a-sketch incident. that was the first time. over a year of lying. >> stephanie: who brought you that moment of the campaign cycle i wonder? [ ding ding ] [ applause ] >> john: thank you, my dear. >> stephanie: john fuglesang for cnn. >> john: when the media spends a year discussing whether or not mitt romney is a citizen of this country and the birth certificate is a fake, when the mainstream does that to him -- >> john is in the tank for obama because he has so much melanin. >> stephanie: ann romney said her husband has a tremendous skill set. if mitt were there, we would not be facing sequestration right now. >> of course you would because the republicans would have cooperated. >> john: it is completely true. the rich would have a tax cut. they would be cutting funds. medicare age would go up to 70 and there would be no sequestration. >> stephanie: the rich have it too hard in this country. >> the republicans would work with romney. they promised not to work with

obama. >> unemployment would be in triple digits. >> john: which is why they agreed to a sequestration because they thought they would be dealing with that. there are republicans who feel bad about the sequestration. >> both of them, i'm sure. >> stephanie: corky in rochester. you're on with john. hi corky. >> caller: steph i gotta talk you guys off the ledge. >> stephanie: okay. >> caller: barack obama's doing the same thing he did to romney. proceed, mr. boehner. because -- >> stephanie: please, proceed. >> caller: half those cuts and the sequester come from the military spending. now, who's the biggest republican donors to campaigns? it's the military contractors. and there's only about 10 or 12 companies. so when they start losing $42 billion in expenditures -- >> stephanie: yep -- >> caller: they're going to see right in those guys and they're going to come begging to president obama please get us out of this.

>> stephanie: yep. >> riding those guys hard. >> riding those guys hard. >> it will be fantastic. >> rochester. >> you know what? i think he makes a really good point because when the military cuts start to hurt the military, i think the president's going to be in a very good position to show that he tried to stop this from happening. >> stephanie: he's running the famous chipmunk strategy on boehner. >> after you. >> oh, no, thank you. >> i'm pretty happy. >> what happened? >> oh, no! >> despicable, the president and this sequestration. >> you're despicable! >> stephanie: what's with the lizard tongue? mickey in south dakota, you're on with john. >> caller: howdy. three points then a question for john. >> stephanie: yes. >> caller: first, chris, i love your music selection. i heard someone last week saying they didn't like your music. i love it. >> thank you. >> caller: if mitt romney would have won, we would have no more big bird and then --

>> john: no more elmo. >> caller: when we give financial aid to other countries do, we get the money paid back to us and if not, how come we keep giving money to other countries for financial aid? >> because we're an empire and that's how empires stay in power. >> stephanie: very good, john. very good. [ applause ] >> john: simplest answer. >> stephanie: bueller? okay. >> john: was that his question for me? >> stephanie: yes and you answered it. >> john: i passed the audition. >> stephanie: you seemed a little unsure. mr. dillon, i'm thinking it might be this? yes! >> john: did i say empire? i meant last remaining superpower. >> stephanie: okay. why look who's calling from ohio everybody. hang on one second. >> john boehner? >> stephanie: that would be fun, wouldn't it? >> announcer: from ohio, it's the john and pam show ♪ ♪ it's the john and pam john and pam show ♪

>> stephanie: good morning john and pam show. >> caller: good morning, everybody. >> good morning, sweethearts and good morning to you mr. fuglesang. >> john: good morning. >> one thing real quick -- >> stephanie: little minks. >> caller: president obama keeps saying he has an open door policy and that and everything so why are the republicans wanting to play high school and say they want a phone call? open door policy to me means you can go talk to him at any time. >> stephanie: right. even david gregory asked what are the meetings like? you say you have a cordial relationship with the president. because basically they're saying screw you mr. president, aren't they? >> well and i tell you something else too stephanie i've seen this past week that that little wormy -- that little worm, he put out their 2013 calendar. they get 239 days off.

they work 126 days. now, to me, wouldn't you class that as an entitlement program? >> stephanie: yep yep very good. >> caller: when i work, i had to take vacation days. these goofballs they get paid for being off. >> stephanie: that's right. this is one of the best john and pam skits ever even though you forgot your line and john had to -- i love you! >> stephanie: he completes her. he says it, it comes out here. let's go to annie in los angeles. hi annie you're on with john. >> caller: hi, stephanie. >> caller: hi. i just wanted to comment on something you guys were talking about earlier that the president had lied about the fact that the -- they were going to lose income. >> john: i said it wasn't so

and they're beating him with it today. >> caller: it is so. i don't think people realize it. people that work hourly, they look for overtime. >> john: absolutely. >> caller: funds they don't have coming in. >> stephanie: annie, they count on it. >> caller: they're losing money out of their pockets. that's what the president was talking about. >> stephanie: annie they're making it about small ball like that. because i think exactly what you said is perhaps what the president meant but again, it is not the larger issue. the larger issue is this entire sequestration and how we stop this. >> caller: right. they're actually crazy. i think you're about the only sane person that i know that actually talks on the radio. >> stephanie: thank you. >> caller: but they just -- nitpicks about little things that he says. that's true. because people who work hourly and look for overtime so they can fill out -- even the police and things, if you think about it they -- a lot of their salary, they make big salaries

but a lot of it at the end of the year has to do with them doing overtime. as part of their budget, so to speak. >> stephanie: annie, thank you for the compliment about being the only sane person on the radio. it is such a low bar. >> caller: it is a high bar. i think you're wonderful. >> stephanie: thank you honey. very low bar. sanest person in radio is like -- >> i don't care if it is high bar or low bar, as long as i get bourbon. >> the soberest person in boehner's office. >> john: she's right. overtime is pay but when the president says they're going to have their salaries cut and then it was only pertaining to overtime, i'm legislature you know what they're using to beat the president up this week. morning joe christmas with his smug. >> stephanie: small ball. i like watching mica's expressions. whether they're gastrointest that will distress or just kind of general nausea.

i think she goes to a happy place. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] okay. >> i would rather watch bill press. >> me, too. >> so would i! >> stephanie: right back. it is mondays with moogelsang. >> fun days with fuglesang. >> what act of unmitigated evil should the republican party undertake this week? >> announcer: it's "the stephanie miller show."

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>> "viewpoint" digs deep into the issues of the day. >> has the time finally come for real immigration reform? >> with a distinctly satirical point of view. if you believe in state's rights but still believe in the drug war you must be high. >> only on current tv. >> stephanie miller. ♪ don't stop thinkin' about tomorrow ♪ ♪ don't stop, it will soon be

here ♪ ♪ it'll be here better than before ♪ ♪ yesterday's gone, yesterday's gone ♪ >> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome. 50 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. john fuglesang, sexy liberal his own bad self in the new york bureau. >> john: good morning popeless children. >> we're sans pope. >> obama: these cuts are not smart. they'll hurt our economy and cost us jobs. and congress can turn them off at any time. as soon as both sides are willing to compromise. >> stephanie: and when might that happen? the pope, the new pope can tell us when hell will freeze over. >> john: what happens if the republicans want it to slow down? what if they have the same

strategy of doing nothing and they learn nothing from the elections? [ ♪ "jeopardy" theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: jim, who said the president doesn't like the washington press corps and i think the feeling is mutual. there is not a great relationship between the washington establishment and the president? >> david gregory. >> stephanie: yes! you're not supposed to get it right. [ applause ] i thought it was a liberal obama-loving media. i don't understand. >> john: it is so funny. if you read the right wing blogs, they were coming down on gregory for throwing talking points at speaker boehner. those aren't talking points. those are facts. boehner pushed the sequester through the house and made a lot of republicans angry forcing them to vote for it. >> stephanie: let's go to mark in california. you're on with john. >> caller: hi, stephanie hi, mooks, hey john. i just wanted to make a comment. i heard what you said earlier about this being the president's fault. i'm usually 100% on your side but i think this time your logic is flawed. >> john: i'm not blaming the

president for the sequester. i'm blaming the republicans far more. far more for the president. because if they had raised the debt ceiling like they did for bush and reagan, this wouldn't have happened. i don't think the president trusting them that they were going to work with him. he made mistake before. >> stephanie: go ahead mark. >> caller: you're saying a hostage negotiator negotiating with a criminal who's got a gun on a hostage and says look, give me some time. i'll get. >> plane so you can get to cuba, just don't shoot the hostage. you can do what you have to do. he tries to give a pregnant pause so you can stop and talk sense into him. when the guy says at the end sorry, there's no plane. i'm going to shoot her and he shoots her in the leg. you say it is the hostage negotiator's fault. >> john: i didn't say it was his fault. >> caller: even in a small measure, it is not his fault. >> stephanie: mark i agree with you and somebody made the -- i forget which writer it was, if you heard about it.

i think budget director quoted it on "meet the press" yesterday but it is like a holdup. gunman says give me your wallet and you say i don't have it but here's my watch and say so you agreed to it. what do you mean? the president agreed to it? >> the logic is flawed. i know what you're saying but i think sometimes as liberals, we're trying to play the middle of the road and be fair. the president, this is no way using his term fault. it is not his fault. >> stephanie: mark, that's why it is the perfect analogy. someone holds a gun to your head, you give them your watch. did you agree to? yes. >> caller: exactly. that's the problem i have. john, i think you're great but i think our language hurts ourselves. >> john: i think we're on the same side. >> caller: i agree. >> john: i would have tried anything to do what robert rice said and repeal the sequester. it was the aristocracy who had a big feeding frenzy with bush. they caused this problem. what do we see now?

the two party system saying we need us a austerity so they pay for the sins and gluttony of the upper class. it is easy to get cynical. it feels like the republicans and democrats are paying good cop bad cop when the working class always pays. at the end of the day, there is no doubt the g.o.p. is to blame for all of this. i think the president made a mistake when -- and a lot of people agree, when he said last week this was going to cause pay cuts. when we saw the white house start walking back on the threats of dire consequence -- >> stephanie: mark, he never said it was going to be an apocalypse. >> he never said the sky was falling. good people will feel this and it is unnecessary. >> john: they will feel it. >> caller: right. but the republicans tried to make it sound like he was saying the sky was falling. he was giving. >> real definition of what some people are going to feel. when you tell a waitress -- >> john: his entire cabinet was, too. >> caller: when you tell a waitress you're going to lose your tips. do you want to see people lose

their overtime that they depend on just to live in today's economy simply because we won't cut back on corporate loopholes. that's what it is, john. >> stephanie: mark, you are the smartest boy in class this morning. what do you think about that? be. >> caller: thank you stephanie. i love you to death. i hope you come back to l.a. because i missed the last sexy liberal. i wanted to go with my wife. we were out of town. we're going to go to the next one. >> stephanie: i'm in l.a. now. >> caller: i mean for the show. >> stephanie: your dream just may come true, mark. dreams can come true, john. >> we have a little bit coming out of the today show. jeb bush was on there. he says he will not rule out a 2016 white house run but "i won't declare today." >> john: it is already a two horse race. that would be a third bush. bush versus a clinton. >> wow! >> i'm glad we had a war with england to get away from

inherited power. [ buzzer ] >> obama: this is not going to be a -- an apocalypse as some people have said. it is just dumb. it is going to hurt. >> stephanie: yeah, thank you. >> john: going to hurt red states the most, too. >> stephanie: he's called for them to replace the sequester with a balanced approach which combines smart cuts with reforms. even republicans, john, are admitting this is bad. this is dumb. the way the cuts have been -- that's why -- >> john: they're really dumb. republicans don't get to complain about it. it is their fault the president had to propose it and it is their fault this went into effect. >> stephanie: the president said a majority of the american people agree with me including a majority of republicans. we need republicans in congress to catch up with their own party and the rest of the country. that's exactly where we are. i know there are republicans in congress who would rather see tax loopholes closed. i know there are democrats who would rather do smart

entitlement reform than let the cuts go through. a caucus of common sense. i will keep reaching out to them to fix this for good. he said i'm not a dictator. i'm the president. he cannot force republicans in congress to do the right thing. cuts will cost us jobs and both sites need to be able to compromise. the president yesterday. >> obama: many middle class families will have their lives disrupted in significant ways. >> john: mm-hmm. >> stephanie: let's go to barrett in indiana. you're on with john. hi barrett. >> caller: hi. i would like to reframe this whole discussion. i want to close the loopholes and the corporate giveaways as entitlements as well. >> john: thank you. >> caller: as for the 1% should be paying just as much as we the 99%. let them pay 50% toward it and let the 99% pay toward the 50% of it. and that's all i have to say. >> stephanie: yep. thank you barry.

he'll take no more questions john. >> john: he's exactly right. like i said before, it was the aristocracy and the 1% that got us into this mess and now they're calling for austerity from the middle class to bail them out. >> stephanie: it is funny the romneys have re-emerged. there ate argument all over again. [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] 47% moochers. it's weird they resurface right now, john. you made that argument, you lost. >> john: i can only imagine it is because he's been invited to speak at cpac. he's trying to turn himself into being a respected loser despite the republican party never liking him and never will. >> stephanie: we love you john fuglesang. "viewpoint" on current. >> john: have a great show, guys.

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: hello. hour number two. current tv land, eric boehlert from media matters to cohost right-wing world coming up and then in hour number three actress melissa fitzgerald right there making jim uncomfortable. hot brie in the city right there. >> maybe she'll show some cleavage again. >> stephanie: jacki, if she really loved jim, she would bring the stripper pole. we don't know where the pole is. >> we don't know. it had to go with her. can you imagine if she left the pole for the next tenant? they would be like what were you doing here? what kind of brothel were you running? >> i offered -- >> stephanie: the famous pole.

>> i offered to take the pole and hold the pole. oh that sounds bad. hold on to the pole until she found an appropriate spot for it. >> stephanie: jacki we need to stop talking now. >> jim is -- >> exceedingly turned on. >> stephanie: jacki schechner in the current news center. >> came out all wrong. good morning everybody. in about 15 minutes from now president obama is going to announce his nominations to head up the energy department, the e.p.a. and the office of management and budget. he's going to pick myth scientist ernest and walmart's head berwell for each spot respectively. pretty laying out what it sees as possible scenarios moving forward. officially, the cuts will stay -- excuse me, the first idea it has is that the cuts will stay. they're not as bad as expected. maybe congress figures out a way to let the federal department

heads manage the cuts in a more targeted way and less impacted by doing so. things like layoffs cutbacks and uptick in the unemployment line airports, generate media attention. ultimately affect the polls in a way that republicans take notice. then it pushes them back into negotiations and they come up with a short-term fix. the third possibility and this is not likely, we finally get that grand bargain. that deals with both tax reform and entitlement reform and that cancels out the sequester but of course, we've been there before to no avail. now, that pope benedict xvi has retired, the cardinals have the task of picking a new pope. today, they'll meet for their first gathering. the cardinals have to select a kate for the conclave. they have other business at hand first including talking about several issues that plague the catholic church including the on-going sex abuse scandal and financial mismanagement. we're back with more show after the break. stay with us.

young turks is that we're honest. they know that i'm not bs'ing them with some hidden agenda, actually supporting one party or the other. when the democrats are wrong, they know that i'm going to be the first one to call them out. they can question whether i'm right, but i think that the audience gets that this guy, to the best of his ability, is trying to look out for us.

>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ ♪ hey, all right now ♪ ♪ it's time to feel good ♪ sister oh we communicate nonverbally during the break. we speak -- is there something you would like to say to your ex? okay. >> penny lover by lionel richie. >> stephanie: six minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 toll free from anywhere. can you get the beer song ready? i have the maria banford tweet.

at a beer tasting i'm not a beer fan but that doesn't seem to be an issue after four beers. ♪ can't get enough of it ♪ ♪ makes me think i'm a man ♪ ♪ beer, beer, beer ♪ ♪ i could really use a beer ♪ >> stephanie: hooray. >> really good beer, the first glass is fantastic. by the fourth one it doesn't matter. >> you can't taste it anymore. >> stephanie: we did a story last week about girls gone wild has gone bankrupt. and chris in yankton said are you telling me that girls onwild has gone [ bleep ] up? >> i should have thought of that! [ ♪ circus ♪ ] >> stephanie: if you don't have a bleep button, you can't -- all right. it is monday which is my favorite day of the week. why? >> eric boehlert from media matters for america doing the lord's work as usual. ♪ hurts so good ♪ ♪ come on, baby ♪

>> eric boehlert. >> let's dive into the right-wing world. >> stephanie: good morning eric boehlert. >> good morning. >> stephanie: one of my favorite tweets of yourself, of course, you say after losing an on air argument, hannity compares him to a klan member. >> he has this honor flare-up with ellison and hannity doesn't really -- it is sort of just sort of -- there actually wasn't a lot of yelling back and forth. hannity wasn't able to debate in any way. >> stephanie: right. >> he didn't have any comebacks. he pretended he was shocked that a democrat was saying this stuff. then it ended. they got buzzed because hannity never has democrats -- fox doesn't allow democrats to disagree with him. but then he spent the next two or three days rounding up his

friends and saying stuff about them. so junior high. he couldn't really debate in real time and so then he spent the next days trashing the guy behind his back, you know, he compared him to a klan member going after this crazy you know suggesting a lot of the islamophobia stuff. it was disgraceful because he couldn't -- i think he knew he sort of looked bad and so then he had to scramble. it was very juvenile, i thought. >> stephanie: i love your thing about the sequestrations. is this the worst message since new coke? g.o.p. is awful and it is all obama's fault. i was going crazy. the chiron on "meet the press" was are both sides equally to blame for the sequestration? >> of course they are. why does beltway press have to ask that? look at "new york times" column today, headline, obama's fault. i tweeted we should start a

master list of every pundit who writes a column attacking obama for failing to be able to change the republican behavior. i mean that's what it comes down to. after five years of just this radical obstructionism. they're still committed to this narrative that bipartisan -- there is no bipartisan cooperation because one side is to blame. that's obama's fault. bipartisan by definition is two sides coming together and compromising but if one side decides -- ep -- republicans decide they're not going to, let's blame obama. >> stephanie: i was talking about ezra klein's piece in "the washington post." it is amazing. that's where you and i get so irritated with the mainstream press falls down. it is like the president has compromised. he has put forward stuff. all of this stuff. the press pretends hasn't happened. both sides can't come together. right. >> sam stein had a good point --

piece in "the huffington post" saying there's this sort of mythology of the centrist pun crits and all of the pundits you know, wring their hands why can't these people come together. why aren't there leaders on both sides who can meet in the middle. why can't centrix work? as he points out it doesn't work for sequestration because they have to -- if they were to blame republicans, they would have to admit that there's one side that refuses to come to the middle. they would have to admit that obama's the one who's reached out and put numerous -- >> stephanie: cuts. >> on the table and things. so it sort of mucks up their their at this but they want to stick with it. they still want to blame both sides so they just sort of rewrite the story and they ignore what obama has done and what republicans have done. they stick to their mantra. why can't both sides come together when there is one side that refuses. here's the frustrating thing

that drives us crazy. it has been five years! this has been telegraphed from day one. >> stephanie: why won't the president leave by getting out of the way? >> obama is a centrist so by definition, it is the republicans who are causing this >> you know, this whole idea of you know, attacking the president for not being able to change the opposition's behavior. where were the columns attacking w bush for not being able to get tom daschle to change his behavior in the early part of george bush's first term when the allegation was democrats were obstructing and standing in the way of the republican agenda. we've never seen this sort of onslaught where the pundits blame the president for his inability to get the other side to change its mind. we've never seen it because it doesn't make any sense. >> stephanie: meanwhile in right-wing world a liberal obama-loving media. all right. let's dive into the right-wing world. see what's doing. here we go.

rush limbaugh. >> i've never seen this kind of self-absorption. it is uncanny. >> stephanie: look in the mirror. >> the president enjoys, folks reciting the kind of pain americans are going to feel. so we're getting the opposite of leadership. there is no real concern for people and their lives. that's feigned. >> stephanie: wow. that's feign concern. rush's concern for you is real, of course. [ laughter ] >> it must be wonderful to be able to just sort of pierce through, be able to read motivation. obama spent the whole last week talking about the pain this was going to cause but voila! rush limbaugh will tell us, he's not really concerned, you know, it is all an act. a professional actor by trade. maybe he has some insight. >> stephanie: mike huckabee on the fox news. >> it is interesting because you

know to compare obama and nixon, because of the lack of transparency. [ scooby-doo's "huh?" ] because of the fact that they're both kind of creating these enemies lists and going after and targeting reporters they don't like. but there's one big difference. all of the things aside -- watergate cover-up, nixon was a pretty effective president. he got things done. the difference is president obama has not been an effective president. he can't work with congress. he can't even get his own party for the most part, other than obamacare, his signature issue which is collapsing the economy jobs. it is really an insult to richard nixon to make the comparison. >> stephanie: he's just like nixon only worse. wow! >> you need a scorecard to keep track of all of the great misinformation and lies and things like that. obama can't get anything through congress because he can't get democrats -- oh, by the way you can't get anything through

congress because he needs 60 plus votes. let's pretend that doesn't exist. of course, you know, the enemies list, he's going after reporters and you know, there's this mob running the white house. that, of course, all came from -- >> the wouldn't be -- bob woodward, exactly the same as watergate. >> stephanie: did you see frank rich's tweet? are woodward's antics an effort to deflect from his anniversary to not report the wamd hoax. >> poor bob. that was such an awful week for him. it really pulled back the curtain. then the way he dealt with it, you know, he's saying oh, i never used the word threat. i wasn't complaining. oh boy. >> stephanie: oh boy. >> what exactly were you doing on cnn last week, went before the cameras to complain. that whole thing was -- you know, it tied into this right wing fantasy of this chicago thug life and how they're out to

break knuckles and things like that but then when we actually read the e-mails you know, the whole thing fell apart. >> stephanie: sperling o was on "meet the press." he's like this overly polite accountant. you're going oh, yeah, i can see where he's almost like tony soprano. you would be terrified of an e-mail from him. brad blakeman on the fox news. >> the president says he will preserve protect and defend america. at the time of sequester, the president should have come on television, tell the american people, regardless who is to blame, i will assure you as president, i will cause as much and at least disruption to the america people as possible. instead, he's instructed his government to inflict as much pain as possible. >> what? no! >> stephanie: excuse me? >> i'm not sure he understands how the whole thing works here. it is not like the white house has an a la carte menu with the

sequestration. >> here's the people i want to cause pain. >> stephanie: let me turn it up to 11. >> they're going to pick and choose. you saw piece of that. there were certainly claims that this was all -- you know, a long ago but hatched plan by obama to eviscerate the military and this is all done by design. he knew it was going to happen and this is how he -- you know, again, that's not how this thing was -- came together. and you know, they both -- both sides agreed they would be the cuts. he doesn't have any -- he's not picking and choosing here. >> stephanie: eric boehlert remains in the sidecar. we continue right-wing world after this. >> announcer: for ad for a game, call now. 1-800-steph-12. [ male announcer ] get more during red lobster's lobsterfest. with the year's largest selection of mouth-watering lobster entrees. like our delicious lobster lover's dream, featuring two kinds of lobster tails. or our savory, new grilled maine lobster and lobster tacos. my favorite entree is the lobster lover's dream.

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(vo) she gets the comedians laughing and the thinkers thinking. >>ok, so there's wiggle room in the ten commandments, that's (vo) she's joy behar. >>current will let me say anything.

♪ dude looks like ♪ >> stephanie miller. >> stephanie: 22 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12. eric boehlert from media matters remains in the sidecar for right-wing world. we were talking about sean hannity still whining about his ass kicking from keith ellison. >> congressman keith ellison's meltdown here on hannity, we decided to take a closer look at the man who called me immoral and a liar. didn't take long to prove his hypocrisy as his past reveals a host of radical connections primarily to louis farrakhan and the nation of islam. this congressman not only associated with these radicals but i spent years spewing their hateful rhetoric. >> what? >> wow! >> why did you invite him on your show? >> we've had keith ellison on

this show many times. i've never seen him spew hateful rhetoric. >> you remember glenn beck, in his cnn days, he infamously suggested if ellison's loyalties were with the other site, you know talking about the war on terror, way back when. there's some reason -- there's just some weird reason the right wing is obsessed with i believe the lone muslim congressman in america. they just can't -- obsess about him. again, why did hannity -- was going to do his mccarthyism stuff, the deep associations, then why the you have him on your show? again, it proves why he doesn't have people who talk back to him on his show because then he has to spend the rest of the week cleaning up the mess he's made. >> stephanie: remember the right wing -- the republican -- i think running against keith ellison but was talking about building a wall keeping muslims out of america. he's from detroit.

what are you going to do? build a wall around detroit? charles on cavuto. >> the president won 50.98% of the vote. >> i thought it was 97. >> he acts like it is 98%. he's running around saying he's not a dictator. guess what. he acts like it sometimes. >> based on what? >> stephanie: yes right. >> you know, the whole idea is that, you know, elections are -- you're the barometer of everything unless you lose. then when you lose, electoral landslide by 132 electoral votes, suddenly it is not that big of a deal. we're so 50/50. we're not. if you look at the demographics. you look at what obama won, it was a route. but he's a dictator. george bush, you know, after he won re-election, he went on this huge push to privatize social

security. >> stephanie: giant mandate. >> he won by like two states. >> re-election should be in quotation marks. >> there's that. >> stephanie: but it's interesting because the president actually just said when people act like he could stop the sequester, he said i'm not a dictator. i can't make congress do the right thing. >> it is proof he's a dictator! >> it -- doesn't it prove everything? >> stephanie: mitt romney on fox news sunday. >> i wish i were there. it kills me not to be in the white house doing what needs to be done. the president is the leader of the nation. the president brings people together does the deals, does the trades, knocks the heads together. the president leaves and i don't see that kind of leadership happening. >> yeah, we see leadership. >> stephanie: oh please, mittens. >> you know, he was so forthful about how it is killing hip. ann romney talked about same thing. you know, as i pointed out he could barely fake interest in

running for president. this idea that the both of them are just -- they can't sleep at night out on malibu or wherever -- >> stephanie: la jolla. >> with their car elevators that they can't sleep at night. he was never that person. he never had that burning desire. you know, you don't nominate someone to run for president who's worth a quarter of a billion dollars. there's just not that incentive. you have to have this insatiable appetite. listening to him now, it is so clear it wasn't there. >> stephanie: you're like it kills me really. i need to have a wave machine in addition to the ocean to sleep. >> like he's reading it off a cue card. it kills me to not be in the white house. >> i'm devastated as you can tell or i wouldn't grin. >> stephanie: eric boehlert, great stuff as usual from media matters. see you next week, honey. >> okay, bye-bye. [ applause ] >> stephanie: la jolla.

>> you pulled an eric boehlert this morning. >> stephanie: when i was hanging up on someone? >> you already had your phone in the purse. >> stephanie: i want to be the one to leave first. >> i win! >> stephanie: you say good-bye last no, you say good-bye last. >> oh, really. >> stephanie: vera in seattle you're on the "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: hi. i'm just calling to let the g.o.p. know one thing. the working class in seattle there are a lot of jobs here. the people here are pulling together and that 47% if the deal -- if they think they're going to knock us down, they've got another thought coming. we're stronger than they think. >> stephanie: you rock on, vera! >> stephanie: did you see this piece in "the washington post"? stymied by the g.o.p. house obama looks ahead to 2014. remember i was saying if people get ticked off enough, i don't care. look at the voter suppression --

unprecedented voter suppression and guess what. it pissed people off more than anything. they turned out in even bigger numbers. i just -- i know we hear all of this about the gerrymandering and oh, it can't but it's interesting. "washington post" reads president obama now facing the consequences of automatic spending cuts and the complications they raise for his broader domestic agenda is taking the most specific steps with his administration in an attempt to insure the election of a democratically-controlled congress in two years. >> good. that would be awesome. >> stephanie: what i can't do is what i just said. [ ♪ dramatic ♪ ] obama fresh off his re-election began almost at one -- plans to win back the house in 2014 which he and his advisers believe will be crucial to the outcome of the second term and his legacy as president. he's doing so by trying to articulate his feelings and a party that blocks the most politically popular elements of his agenda. did you see john mccain and his southern bell, lindsey

graham? oddly enough, they were on -- don't speak to me that way. >> oh, my stars. i've never been spoken to that way in my life. i'll be on the fainting couch. >> stephanie: but they were once again saying they're not going to confirm the c.i.a. appoint until they get more on benghazi. more on "the washington post" piece. what else the president can do at this point? he needs a congress that he can work with. all right. more lindsey graham when we come back. andy i've never! 29 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." criticizing, and holding policy to the fire. are you encouraged by what you heard the president say the other night? is this personal or is it political? a lot of my work happens by doing the things that i am given to doing anyway. staying in

tough with everything that is going on politically and putting my own nuance on it. not only does senator rubio just care about rich people but somehow he thinks raising the minimum wage is a bad idea for the middle class. but we do care about them, right? vo: the war room tonight at 6 eastern [ rosa ] i'm rosa and i quit smoking with chantix. when the doctor told me that i could smoke for the first week... i'm like...yeah, ok... little did i know that one week later i wasn't smoking. [ male announcer ] along with support chantix is proven to help people quit smoking. it reduces the urge to smoke.

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>> everyone, we need to discuss our problem with -- >> stephanie miller. >> her little habits of personal amusement is getting way out of hand. >> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." 34 minutes after the hour. hot brie in the city and right there next to jim next hour. melissa fitzgerald, actress extraordinaire. jim, what are you doing over there? i'm taunting you with my new steven stills hat. i got to hang out with him. >> he's got a four cd set coming out march 26th. 50 years, more than five hours of music. >> stephanie: i got to hear his new album.

he grabbed a guitar and started playing. this is cool! coolest thing that ever happened to me. >> he is awesome. >> crosby stills and nash. >> and jimi hendrix. >> stephanie: i think i put my wine down on a million dollar guitar. [ screaming ] >> when you go to a famous musician's house don't touch anything! [ laughter ] >> stephanie: apparently some of them a little pricy. >> you're going to crack mom's crystal egg. >> stephanie: we call that one the house in hawaii. sorry. >> was the neck supposed to hang off like that? >> stephanie: i'm sure that drink thing will come out of there. his wife, impossibly gorgeous. >> rock star. >> stephanie: exactly. she looks exactly what you would think. she's smart and nice. and he took me to some fancy private club where i also embarrassed myself. >> did you use the wrong fork

for dessert? >> stephanie: i have no idea which fork. probably. >> she used the tuning fork. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: i used the musical spoon. >> musical spoon. >> stephanie: hey, you know where there's been some legendary music? at the chicago theatre. jerry in cicero says i love you mama. do we still have a date on april 13th in chicago. >> computer says yes. ♪ my sweet home, chicago ♪ >> hey chicago you say twice wasn't enough? >> 15 is my limit. >> stephanie miller's sexy liberal comedy tour is making a return visit to chicago theatre on april 13th. with bad attitudes. >> witness the he can cleeseastical mook, john fuglesang, hilarious heartthrob hal sparks and catholic girl gone wild, stephanie miller as they reunite for another night of inspired comedy. >> we're putting the band back together.

we're on a mission from god. >> tickets are available at ticketmaster.com. come see the tour that sparked a number one comedy album and its own tv documentary. it is more fun than a bag of vipers. that's the sexy liberal comedy tour at the chicago theatre on april 13th. >> who can argue with that? >> sweet home chicago is about to get more sugar from mama. ♪ sweet home, chicago ♪ >> bag of vipers not included. >> stephanie: that's right. cameron in charlotte writes steph, tell jim that boner is positively flabbergasted that he's mocked on live radio for his ridiculous lisp. it is despicable. >> you're despicable! sufferin' succotash it is the president's sequestration. >> it is cotton mouth. experienced that a lot in college. >> stephanie: that and the lizard tongue is searching for water. water here. >> because when you smoke and

drink, you get parched. >> stephanie: exactly. i must have made some incorrect movie reference on the show. hardly ever happens. chris in yankton writes steph it is -- what you're thinking is the scene in dr. strangelove where they're driving the bus that dennis hopper has planted a bomb on and lillian drives the bus off a cliff and yells yippie i susan sarandon. do i have something on my face now? >> i was actually scratching. >> stephanie: we keep doing that to each other all morning. >> i had a big cottage cheese hunk -- >> stephanie: stealing your own joke. okay. >> i'm in the going to tell you how my weekend was. [ buzzer ] >> stephanie: hello, dana in maryland. >> caller: good morning. how are you? just wanted to get a happy birthday. >> caller: yes, it is. >> stephanie: happy birthday.

>> caller: nobody i would rather talk to. that was a party -- putting wine on the guitar. >> stephanie: i made that up. >> caller: no. >> stephanie: gibsons and martins and lions and tigers and bears, oh, my. >> caller: i guess dennis rodman is our new north korean spokesman. for the love of ghandi, seriously? do we -- the kardashians you know, dennis rodman? he's on with george stephanopoulos. i'm not watching him again. >> stephanie: i know. talk about -- people thinking we're stupid. that's why. >> stephanie: i thought it was like green -- >> they made rodman just weird enough to talk to the kims. >> stephanie: we should send our weirdest ambassador. >> kim jong-un is a famous chicago bulls fan. >> stephanie: dennis rodman

not really a current -- chicago bull. >> but he was a chicago bull when the chicago bulls were world-class. >> bouncing off satellites and what not. >> stephanie: okay. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: barbara in d.c. welcome. >> caller: hi, stephanie. hi mooks. i'm calling because i had a comment about ann romney and how she's blaming the media for presenting the romneys as wealthy snobs. >> stephanie: right. how dare they. >> caller: she did that all by herself. she was on a morning show and the reporter was asking her about would the romneys release more than two years of tax returns. >> stephanie: when she said you people to robin roberts. >> caller: exactly. >> stephanie: that seemed unfortunate. an unfortunate scene from "the help." >> caller: that's exactly what she said and she sounded like a

stuck up snob. >> here, have some pie! >> stephanie: we did. we baked them a magical electoral pie. [ ♪ magic wand ♪ ] >> eat my -- >> that was a line from the help. that was an os o car win moog i have. -- that was an oscar-winning movie. >> you people. >> jessica chastain from "zero dark thirty." >> stephanie: do you think she did that? robin roberts is going into the wrong bathroom. [ screaming ] >> i don't think she did. >> stephanie: i was talking about the -- [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] this makes me happy clappy. "the washington post" stymied by a g.o.p. house. obama looks ahead to 2014. i like this. forward. forward. we're still going forward, chris lavoie. >> i've heard. tv made you flinch. >> fresh off his re-election, he began executing plans to win

back the house. see, it can be done. he's doing so by trying to articulate for the american electorate, his feelings like we're all feeling with the opposition party. obama has committed to raising money for fellow democrats for viable candidates, furthering his agenda. the goal is to flip the republican-held house allowing obama to push forward. gun control, immigration climate change, the economy during his final two years. >> alleluia. >> stephanie: a democratic strategist said clearly the president is winning the debate on the sequester but it is act seven of what will be a 12-act play. i think the most significant impact the president has on the midterms will be his favorability at that time. the president yesterday. on the sequester. >> obama: beginning this week, many middle-class families will have their lives disrupted in significant ways. >> stephanie: yeah. steve israel, representative for new york says the president understands to get anything done he needs a democratic majority in the house of

representatives. the president yesterday. >> obama: if i'm a man or woman in uniform in afghanistan right now, the notion that my school for my children on an army base might be disrupted because congress didn't act that's an impact. >> stephanie: have we done this next one? i don't know. about the tax loophole? >> we have not. >> stephanie: let's play that as well. >> obama: none of this is necessary. it is happening because republicans in congress chose this outcome over closing a single wasteful tax loophole that helps reduce the deficit. >> yep. >> stephanie: by the way remember the right wing rellic from the last election cycle that called in, the preskeeter? what's the president's done? he's a community organizer. that guy? >> the one who almost said he went to a med rossa. >> stephanie: he was from the first election cycle. >> he was totes adorbs. >> stephanie: julie sends us, some fun facts for the kansas moron. what's the president's done?

they can't even keep that straight whether he's done too much and he's a dictator -- >> he has done too much if not enough. in a kenyan way. >> stephanie: i can't read all of them. obama's top 50 accomplishments. i'll read a few. preskeeter if you're listening. skeeter has more recent talking points. okay. passed healthcare reform. passed a stimulus which created a total of 3.7 million private sector jobs, skeeter. passed wall street reform, ended the war in iraq, began drawdown during the war in afghanistan turned around the auto industry, repealed don't ask don't tell. told mubarak to go reverse bush torture policies and improved america's image abroad, created a race to the top. improved food safety, achieved new stark treaty, invested heavily in renewable technology. expanded health coverage for children. expanded same cell research.

killed the f-22. >> like said, he ain't done nothing. [ applause ] >> done too much if not enough. >> stephanie: exactly. he has been clearly -- he has done clearly too much if not enough. scott in oklahoma, you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: hi, miss stephanie. how you all doing? >> stephanie: good. go ahead. >> caller: i think you guys are missing a couple of things. don't get me wrong. i voted for obama twice. but i'm kind of getting disenchanted here. >> stephanie: okay. >> caller: the sequester, when you stand back and look at it, saved the military cuts is paul ryan's budget. >> stephanie: wait a minute. saved the military cuts? >> minus the military cuts. >> caller: yes. minus the military cuts, you're looking at cuts in education cuts to infrastructure. it is the paul ryan budget. >> stephanie: no because the big thing is there's no cuts to medicare and social security. that's what the right is screaming about.

that's the problem is that everybody thinks this should be done in a more balanced way. that's the point the president made. >> stephanie: all right. 45 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: go ahead, laugh out loud in your cubicle. [ laughter ] everyone already think you're a left wing lunatic anyway! it's "the stephanie miller show."

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you've heard stephanie's views. >>no bs, authentic, the real thing. >>now, let's hear yours at the only online forum with a direct line to stephanie miller. >>the only thing that can save america now: current television. >>join the debate now. >> stephanie miller. ♪ burn, baby, burn ♪ ♪ burn, baby, burn ♪ >> i agree all disco records

should be burned. >> stephanie: 15 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12 the phone number toll free from anywhere. oh, look, it is the republican herp derp stack again. >> what did they do now? >> stephanie: republican of -- in washington state does not think bicycling is environmentally friendly because it causes bicyclists to have increased heart rate and perspiration. >> plants breathe co2 and exhale oxygen. it is called a symbiotic relationship. >> stephanie: he said you would be getting more co 2 by riding a bike than in a car. he hasn't done analysis. others have. [ applause ] >> that is why the republican party is dying. >> stephanie: did you not get the memo from bobby jindal? stop being the stupid party! >> i'm trying to exercise the

stupid out of the stupid party. >> stephanie: how is that going? not so good. >> computer says no. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: we were talking about john mccain and lindsey graham. lindsey absolutely has the vapors over benghazi. >> clutching his pearls. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: are you going to let him speak to me that way? i don't know why i decided he's aunt bea. they said they want answers from the obama administration. answers i tell you! >> what's the question? >> stephanie: and are willing to oppose the administration's choice to be the new cia director. they've got chuck hagel in and now they're going to try to block -- graham said sunday, he and mccain are hell bent on making sure the american people understand this debacle called benghazi. mccain said he also -- >> we know what happened. because republicans cut funding

for embassy security. that's what happened. they're in danger of going after this thing so hard and so bad that they're going to clintonize it. where clinton got a 70% approval rating because he was so under attack from the republicans. >> stephanie: we spent how much of taxpayer's money on a land deal where they lost money? >> right. they're really in danger of overplaying their hand here. >> stephanie: i've never. fainting couch. >> it is the biggest catastrophe in the history of cat ast rovfies. i believe i'm getting the vapors. >> stephanie: can't he do his sunday shows from the fainting couch? >> i'm sure they've installed lights and a camera. >> stephanie: sarah palin has her own little set-up. can't he have that on the veranda? >> with a pitcher of mint juleps. >> stephanie: hi grady. >> caller: good morning, stephanie. how you doing? >> stephanie: good. go ahead.

>> caller: now, i obtained some firsthand information about how corporations dealing with government contracts are handling the sequestration. >> stephanie: right. >> caller: they're asking their employers or employees not only to give up any chance of overtime, they're asking them to take a 20% pay cut. >> stephanie: yeah, yeah. look, the president is right. whatever you want to parse terms about exactly what he said. they're dumb cuts. they'll hurt real people. by the way our callers have been saying why don't the legislators take a pay cut? senator claire mccaskill and senator bill nelson are proposing such a thing. they'll introduce legislation that would cut pay for members of congress if federal employees are furloughed because of the sequester. the sequestration.

that was the john boner pronunciation. >> it calls for cuts once federal furloughs begin. good! a little consistency. let's go to marylou in philly. welcome. >> caller: good morning. >> stephanie: good morning. >> caller: here's my point. i'm sad for the people who are going to lose their overtime, however, why can't both private corporations and government pay a decent salary to those people so they don't have to work overtime? the last time i did my fractions, everybody is getting three for two. >> stephanie: right. you know it is like when george bush said this thing i have three jobs. good for you. uniquely american. no. no three time at all for family or anything. in my case, hypothetically but if i had a life, i would want more time for it. what? clay in maine.

you're on "the stephanie miller show." hi clay. >> caller: how are you? >> stephanie: good. >> caller: i love seeing you guys and the beginning of my day is perfect. >> stephanie: and then it all goes downhill from there? >> caller: hello. can you hear me? listen, i know this is a little old. mittens. we're past mittens. he doesn't realize we're done with that election. and i ask myself, remember ann's comment? stop it! it's hard. this is hard. we can't do this. >> ann: stop it. >> caller: remember when you were governor of massachusetts and they jumped to 48th in jobs and he left them with a $1.8 billion deficit and he wants to criticize what obama is managing to prevent a complete disaster? >> stephanie: he's doing it all wrong as mittens pointed out this weekend.

>> he stopped doing this with his hands. >> stephanie: mittens naming objects. it was like a roller coaster. campaign was a roller coaster. ups and downs. we were like i don't remember the ups but okay. >> it went down and down and down. >> stephanie: jonathan in minneapolis. you're on the "the stephanie miller show." hi john. >> caller: hey mama. hey, mooks. i wanted to touch on hannity and ellison. he's my congressman. i've worked for him. he's the greatest. you know i thought -- if he want to the touch back on his relationship with the nation of islam and farrakhan when have they been politically relevant lately? they do great things but are they turning any tides? oh, nation stuff then so now this election is totally skewed. then they want to say well they're preaching hate. like oh, white folks are picking on us. black people can't believe that.

gerrymander their district so they can't vote for anybody. >> stephanie: yeah exactly. >> caller: they're speaking the truth. >> stephanie: i'm sure congressman ellison was too busy spending time with the new black panther party. that will be on this week. >> i had in my hand the list of 205 in the state department. >> stephanie: i bet you he will. he will be a pinata on fox news this week as well. they've got a -- sean's got a new liberal binky. all right. 58 minutes after the hour. activist melissa fitzgerald hot brie in the city next on "the stephanie miller show."

[ ♪ theme ♪ ] >> stephanie: hello current tv land hour number two. activist melissa fitzgerald, hot brie in the city right there in just a couple of minutes. jacki schechner. >> i decided if i have to have a cheese nickname, i should be pepper jack. >> that's. >> solve the. >> stephanie: because you're spunky and spicy. >> and sometimes little bits get stuck in your teeth. >> well then -- >> okay. >> stephanie: i guess i would be a more aged cheese. i'll have to think of something old, stinky cheese. >> something old and crumbly. >> stephanie: cranky. exactly.

oh, this just in by the way -- [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] cpac got sadder. pam gellar said i applied to speak and i was ignored. she's become the glenn close. >> i'm going to cancel my trip to cpac. >> i know you were excited. >> you were going to bring your rabbit. >> stephanie: jacki schechner in the current pepper jack in the current news center. >> president obama presented his new nominees just a few moments ago. he's nominated ernie for energy. gina mccarthy for e.p.a. and sylvia matthews berwell. the president spoke of the challenge that with burrwell has. at the same time he issued this warning. >> obama: eventually, a lot of people are going to feel some pain. that's why we've gotta keep on working to reduce our deficit in a balanced way. the first lady is holding her first ever google plus

hangout. just a few moments from now. to continue to promote her let's move initiative. now in its third year. she will be in the blue room of the white house to interact with families from across the country. kelly ripa is moderating. you can tune in online at let's move.gov. unless the boy scouts of america changes its tune, they can wave good-bye to train. train had agreed to play at the national jamboree in july. it was unaware of the organization's anti-gay discrimination policy and train has posted a note on its web site saying it looks forward to playing at the event in july but only if the boy scouts change their policy and decide to allow gay scouts and leaders. carly rae jepsen is scheduled to perform and she has yet to respond to the petition asking that she speak out. she did tell "time" magazine last may she's all for acceptance and doesn't consider same-sex relationships unusual. we'll see what happens. we're back after the break. stay with us.

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>> announcer: ladies and gentlemen, it's "the stephanie miller show." ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ ♪ hey, all right now ♪ ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ >> stephanie: oh yes, it is. six minutes after the hour. it is "the stephanie miller show." and it is not often when melissa fitzgerald or -- actress activist extraordinaire melissa fitzgerald joins us or we call you by your stripper name, of course, hot brie. ♪ hot brie on stephi ♪ ♪ lookin' sexy ♪ ♪ hot brie on with stephi ♪

>> okay, i love that. >> i love it. thank you. [ applause ] >> stephanie: thank you, rocky mountain mike. every girl remembers when she gets her first jingle. >> i'm so excited! especially since it is a stripper jingle. my mom's going to be so proud. >> stephanie: rocky mountain mike yesterday, i wrote, can you do hot child in the city? hilarious. so everybody wants to know the first question is. [ ♪ "jeopardy" theme ♪ ] where is the stripper pole? >> right now, i think it is sitting in my new apartment not set up. >> stephanie: jim would like to come unpack later today. >> i don't know if it is going to fit in the new apartment. the ceiling height, i don't know. i may have to give it away to somebody. >> stephanie: uh-oh. might be you jim. how does she feel about stripper dances? >> ceiling is a little too high in the living room for that. >> stephanie: vodka makes jim

angry. he might break it. >> did i fix the table though. after i broke it. >> stephanie: not when you were drunk. you had sobered up. >> yes. >> stephanie: all right. so i was telling jim that we had a slumber party last night. i said i know you were hoping it was neighbored with pillow fights but it was us scream at david gregory. >> it was. which was even more exciting. [ screaming ] >> stephanie: i warned you in advance. the chiron says are both sides equally to blame for the sequestration. we're just asking. >> how can they say that? it is like somebody said something mean to you and somebody else punched you in the face. are you both wrong? >> did fdr really cause the holocaust? >> stephanie: what? no. >> he and hitler came into power at the same time. that's where the comparison ends. >> stephanie: it is the false equivalence that drives me -- also, we were obsessed with the fact that john boehner has a lisp. >> i know. >> it's ridiculous. it is like sequestration, it is

stupid. >> you do a better him than he does. >> stephanie: i don't know why, chris let's play some. this is john boehner. he has a lizard tongue and a lisp. as i told the president once again yesterday we all know what the problem is. we've got run away spending. >> no, we don't! >> i feel forced to make fun of how he says things because what he says you can't even discuss it it is so crazy and incorrect. it is infuriating. >> stephanie: right. we were like stage moms watching david gregory like in a synchronized swim meet. oh that was almost a question. oh, don't drop it now. oh! he would ask a question but then he would just -- >> this is the worst crisis since the germans bombed pearl harbor. >> germans? >> forget it. >> stephanie: here's more john boehner yesterday.

>> i made it clear to the president. a trillion dollars worth of tax hikes in obama care. he got another $650 billion worth of tax hikes on january 1st. you can't tax our way out of problem. >> it's ridiculous. >> stephanie: we were saying somebody was make the analogy who was it on "meet the press." they were saying it is like -- if someone held the president up at gunpoint and said give me your wallet, he said here, take my watch. you're like well, the president agreed to give me -- he didn't really -- to avoid having -- you know, the country go into default, yes. >> by the way didn't we vote in november and didn't we decide that we wanted more tax -- i remember being on the road. that was the center point of my speech and most other people's speeches. every single crowd we spoke to responded to that almost more than anything else consistency. we voted on that. the people voted on it. we won. >> stephanie: that's right. you called in.

>> raise taxes. it is ridiculous. >> stephanie: you called in from the road. you were i think on the hot liberal nuns on the bus tour. you and debbie wasserman and jan schakowsky. >> we were. >> well-known nuns. [ laughter ] >> i'm going with it. [ laughter ] >> but i love those nuns on the bus. love them. aren't they great? >> stephanie: we just had her on. what's her new favorite catchphrase? she would say oh, my glory. >> i'm stealing it. >> stephanie: me too. normally we sound like a loading duck. we need to clean it up a little bit. >> oh, my glory. >> stephanie: all right. i know you traveled all over the country, here's something that's shocking. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] i meant in the south. oh my glory. >> be nice. there are a lot of sexy

liberals. >> stephanie: i apologize for the crackers. sorry. gal um's most miserable -- gallup's most miserable. rising obesity rates plague many of america's southern states according to the states. >> due to government cheese? >> i'm down for cheese. >> stephanie: what do you think, hot brie? [ laughter ] >> stephanie: the index looks at six categories, life evaluation, work environment healthy behavior, physical health yada, yada. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] this one h.i.v. infection most concentrated in the south where students still learn about it in school. how about that? the cdc's most recent report, one clear trend emerges where concentration of h.i.v. infections tends to be higher. no coincidence to many of the states lacking the educational requirements that would educate the residents. >> teach them abstinence. that's all you need.

>> stephanie: health classes in texas florida north carolina, louisiana and mississippi aren't required to provide medically accurate information. public schools don't have to offer any type of sexual health education whatsoever in texas or florida. >> that makes me sad and it also angers me a bit because lives are at stake here and why are we not doing this? why is access to information politicized and turned into something that's bad rather than good? why is education bad? >> stephanie: yeah. what was i going to say? i liked health class. i got my first big laugh because she was laughing about crab lice and they swing from hair to hair and i yelled geronimo. >> that's when you knew you wanted to be a comedian. >> you killed! >> how old were you then? >> phyllis diller would laugh.

[ laughter ] >> stephanie: all right. and this is how we get adults that are like the rapey republicans that think -- >> legitimate rape. >> not something you hear about in health class. >> stephanie: magical powers. >> they didn't teach me that. >> stephanie: your magical powers, hot brie. at least jim thinks so. leader of the california republican group may are revived the controversial subject of rape and pregnancy. it is a woman right? celeste grieg. she told a newspaper that pregnancies by rape are rare because it is an act of violence because the body is traumatized. she ironically was trying to criticize todd aiken -- >> but she agreed with him. >> stephanie: victims of legitimate rape very rarely gets pregnant because the body has a way of shutting it down. she said it was an insensitive remark. he should have come back and apologized then she went on to say granted, the percentage of

pregnancies due to rape is small because the body is traumatized. what? she went on to reiterate exactly what he said. okay. if you would like some -- they're not really fun facts. most research on rape and pregnancy has shown roughly the same rates as pregnancies resulting from consensual sex. one says they get pregnant to more than double of consensual sex. >> so it was just the opposite. >> stephanie: right with consensual sex, the authors theorize women have the option of declining sex or using contraception. there is a high likely of getting pregnant because of their ovulation cycle. you have -- a woman a republican woman putting the same kind of information out. >> there must be some kind of far right show, radio show or o something like that where they get this information from that they -- they then disimnate. it is all false but it sounds like typical -- legitimate propaganda. >> it seems like there are

computers available we can fact check. why is that not happening? >> todd aiken was quickly fact checked. that's why i lost. >> the facts of the liberal bias. everyone knows that. it is ridiculous. >> stephanie: makes the impression lispier now. >> you're despicable! [ laughter ] >> you're indespeckable. >> rabbit season, not duck season. >> stephanie: mike in madison you're on with hot brie. hi mike. >> caller: hi, gang. i had a solution for president obama. you asked what could he do? he can actually convene congress. constitution gives him the ability to. he can convene congress every day until they pass all of the legislation that was filibustered for the last four years. >> stephanie: hmm. well, that's worth checking into. >> sure. >> stephanie: hot brie, get on that.

>> excuse me. >> we have the google. >> stephanie: see she's very socially aware. i told jim the other day you asked me to go to a dinner party about genocide. jim quickly spun it like it was a pro genocide dinner which i had to explain it was not. >> fabulous documentary called after coney -- >> stephanie: she is not pro genocide. >> i'm really not. this was a dinner where somebody -- >> prove it to him. >> oh, my god. i'm going to send you some stuff. i wrote something for "the new york times" about it. i will send that to you. tv stop being hypnotized by her smokin' hot looks. look at her big brain. >> that's hot! [ ♪ hypnotic ♪ ] >> stephanie: more hot brie in the city on "the stephanie miller show." >> announcer: she's your home prozac. it's "the stephanie miller show."

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♪ we gotta rock down to ♪ >> stephanie miller. ♪ avenue and then we'll take it higher ♪ ♪ we've gotta rock down to ♪ >> stephanie miller. ♪ and then we'll take it higher ♪ ♪ boy ♪ >> he says boy. >> more like delanci avenue. >> stephanie: 22 minutes after the hour. activist melissa fitzgerald live in studio with us. you can tell because jim has that dopey look on his face. >> oh!

>> stephanie: we had a slumber party last night. hot brie is moving into my neighborhood. >> so close. i drove past my street this morning in three minutes. clocked it. >> stephanie: i know it. >> three minutes. >> stephanie: because -- and it was kind of slumber party in that we were b already -- we were bitching about exes. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: i love this story. lindsey, on tear year couple -- ontario couple charged over chip and dip. there was enough chip dip to go around. lindsey couple are facing charges for assaulting each other with chips and dip. >> is this ontario canada? >> stephanie: yes. when officers arrived at the scene of the disturbance after 1:00 a.m., they found both people covered in chips and dips. after apparently fighting over the last beer. >> i spilled the last -- sorry. [ applause ]

>> doesn't that make you want to get married? >> stephanie: to you! >> now you're going to have to call her tomorrow morning and apologize. >> stephanie: sorry about the thing i said on the show. i know you're straight. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] she snows it is a recording. i'm usually to drunk to make the call. [ bleep ] okay. don't even bother with a fresh one. she knows. she's like i know. we had gavin newsom on last week. he is going to marry -- >> sitting in that chair. >> stephanie: he will do the ceremony. but now then i can't marry you and have him do the ceremony because whoever i marry will leave me for either one of you. >> stephanie: wait a minute. those two are hot. >> which way do i go? >> but it is his brain and his deeds that make him so hot.

>> stephanie: i asked him if his teeth were real. >> i heard that. >> stephanie: i'm like are you teeth real? >> that made him uncomfortable. >> stephanie: everything i do makes somebody uncomfortable. president obama said friday, also i'm having chris kluwe punt the bouquet. >> because that accomplishes what? >> stephanie: i don't know. you just want him at your wedding. >> can you blame her? >> no. >> stephanie: president obama said friday he felt compelled to weigh in on the california same-sex marriage case before the supreme court because of his and society's positive evolution on states. he said last year upon a long period of reflection, we can not discriminate against same-sex couples. the same evolution i've gone through is the evolution the country as a whole has gone through and it is a positive thing. i felt it was important for us to articulate what i believe and what this administration stands for if the supreme court asked me or my solicitor general do we think meets the constitutional muster, it was important for us

to answer that question honestly and the answer is no. ♪ let's hear it for the boy ♪ [ applause ] >> i wonder what david gregory thinks about everything. >> stephanie: yes. that's what i think. thank god it is only on for an hour a week. >> it makes my blood pressure go way sky high. >> stephanie: really good job cutting down on my drinking and then saturday and sunday morning -- wow i picked a bad week to quit. >> i watch a lot of them together. >> there are three other shows you could watch that don't have david gregory on them. >> but "meet the press" has been part of my sunday my whole adult life. i can't -- it anchors my week. i gotta watch it. i think there's a part of me and perhaps part of you too that likes to get mad. >> stephanie: let's make -- you know you want david gregory. let's go to joshua in baltimore. you're on with melissa. hey, josh.

>> caller: yeah, i kind of disagree with you on the whole dennis rodman thing. i mean i really don't care if it is dennis rodman. the fact is he's opening the door to diplomacy. it is the first actual time this new leader of north korea says wants to talk. i think it is an opportunity we shouldn't pass on. >> exploit the three-peat. >> stephanie: maybe john kerry will get a nosering now. >> he's tall enough to play basketball. >> stephanie: some tats. >> dennis rodman has never looked good. he looked awful. did you see him on "this week"? he looked awful. >> stephanie: why is he -- >> it was a little confusing and also a little frightening because he knows what he's going to say because i watched him on -- the apprentice. i watched a couple of episodes of that. >> he almost started world war iii there. let alone with world korea. >> stephanie: that's how we

knew our slummer party was going too late. reruns of the apprentice came on. donald trump is an idiot. >> i lost money at a casino. who else can do that. >> stephanie: jerry in seattle, you're on with hot brie. >> caller: hi. >> stephanie: hi. >> caller: i was going to say something about -- i thought the republicans were going to do everything cut the budget, save everything by taking care of loopholes. >> stephanie: yes. >> caller: wasn't that romney's plan? >> stephanie: they did not get around to that. >> caller: the president nails it. they would rather cut all of the stuff and cut one loophole for the rich. that's what this comes down to. gregory did have -- he briefly grew a tiny set. to ask boner you know, but he did, right? >> it was a good question. we got all excited. >> stephanie: boner's like we want -- tax reform.

republicans want tax reform. no, you don't! >> we want the poor to pay more taxes. that's tax reform right there. >> when he says for everyone, for everyone, we voted on this. you decided we wanted -- >> you can't get blood from a stone. >> stephanie: we voted on going back to the clinton tax rate which we didn't -- we're not even there yet. >> i don't know. weren't we doing really well economically back then? >> stephanie: yes, we were. b.j.s for everyone. >> what? >> huh? >> stephanie: b.j. and the bear. good shows were on then. >> vhs tapes. >> stephanie: stop looking at me like that. get the cottage cheese off your lip. 29 minutes after the hour. right back on "the stephanie miller show."

>> she's so cute and furry and soft. >> she also can't control her bowels. why don't we just say that stephanie miller can live with us. >> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." welcome to it. 34 minutes after the hour. actress melissa fitzgerald, hot brie we call her by her stripper name. cameron in charlotte says steph would it be pervy if i request a cell phone picture of melissa speaking said uct lively -- seductively into the phone so i can get it in my e-mail account? i'm sure your wife would be fine with it.

>> stephanie: tommy sends us stuff to the show. they're actually good content but for some reason, every e-mail has a picture of you attached to it. there is no connection to anything. >> luckily there's nothing bad out there about me. i don't think. [ laughter ] >> unless it has been photo shopped. i'm too boring for anything good to be out there. >> stephanie: there is a picture of the inauguration of rowland, jacki and melissa. you made "new york" magazine. prettiest people in the world. roland looks like bond. >> roland is so handsome. >> he is. >> stephanie: he has horrible toenails though. >> does he really? >> stephanie: when we go on vacation she's like sleeping with a gila monster. he will not get off me he claws -- i literally -- i look like -- my calves have been shredded by a cat during the night. >> he takes care of everything else. why doesn't he take care of his

toenails. >> stephanie: i don't know. >> two things there though. what are you guys sleeping that close together? >> stephanie: one of us is having a nervous breakdown at one time or another. >> so you prop each other up or you tear each other down? >> stephanie: cling to each other. >> both. >> one is like throwing the other a life preserver and it sinks like a rock. >> stephanie: melissa can tell you roland wasn't there one night and i ended up on her like a koala. >> stephanie: i was sucking on her like a eucalyptus leaf. that was a long apology. i'm so sorry melissa. >> i hope a bottle of wine came with that apology. >> stephanie: a fruit basket. >> why are you apologizing? >> stephanie: it is like an alien face sucker. she was like get off me! let's go to phil in boston. you're on with hot brie. hello, phil.

>> hi, guys, hello. >> he no, i'm wondering wondering why the president doesn't use the prime time tv address like other presidents have. i think this would be a -- >> stephanie: because he's never done one of those right? >> caller: i can only remember him breaking into tv live to announce bin laden's death really. but i think that if he went on tv and addressed the nation in prime time. >> stephanie: he just did -- okay. >> caller: basically, he doesn't need to name names but he could say listen, we have 18,000 corporations in the country that are using one address in the cayman islands to avoid paying taxes. we have one of the nation's largest banks he doesn't need to say bank of america everybody will be able to figure it out that made $400 million -- >> stephanie: i won't say which one. it is an american bank, a bank here in america. >> caller: i just think that a lot of -- even republican voters would be outraged if it they knew the extent of these loophole abuses. i mean -- and i really think the

republicans would go straight into retreat disappear for a week and they would come out and close some loopholes but i mean people -- the general knowledge of it is just not out there. people don't realize how much revenue we're losing through these loopholes. >> stephanie: he's on tv all the time. what are you saying? >> caller: when he's on, like i saw his address about this the other day. he's usually on in the morning and i guarantee you fox news never covers any of his press conferences because i checked. it is on cnn on msnbc, go to fox, it's not on. the information is not getting to the republican-voting base about exactly what their representatives are defending here. >> stephanie: are you saying no one pays attention to anything that's on tv in the morning? >> caller: i really think it is a matter of -- republican voters are being insulated from all of this stuff. >> stephanie: i hear you. i hear you. he does have a point. i like that he knocked donald trump off tv. the season finale of the

apprentice. not saying he did it on purpose. >> he could have fireside chat equivalents, getting his side of the argument out there to overrule david gregory and people like that. >> i think that would be great. however, everything he's done thus far the republicans are accusing him of campaigning on this. every time he speaks about it. you're campaigning. he's not running. >> he can't run for a third term. >> stephanie: freak out over michelle obama who is invited to -- give an oscar. >> first lady at the oscars? that's never ever, ever happened -- oh, wait! >> stephanie: president knocked whatever off the air. we missed 20 seconds of the kardashians because the president injects himself into everything. >> sadly, do we really feel -- >> honey boo-boo. >> stephanie: you miss honey boo-boo and that woman that looks like a thumb. >> her mother. >> mama june. >> stephanie: a thumb with lips. >> i've never seen it. >> stephanie: i did by accident. we'll show you the picture.

>> it burns it burns! >> stephanie: what were you going to say? >> i think i was going to say that do we really think that people are interested in facts anymore? or is it just that they want to hear from their team telling them what -- >> stephanie: ezra klein did a whole piece in "the washington post" -- uh-oh. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: honey boo-boo's mother. [ laughter ] see, that's why she's going to be a politician because someone that pretty is not allowed to say anything about anyone else. all she's going to do is say oh. i feel sorry for her that she's exploiting her child. i don't care about somebody's looks as well but exploiting your child like that. it seems like not a good thing for the child. >> stephanie: right. i was talking about ezra klein's piece about the facts -- they were saying oh, well, major republicans don't even know what the president has put on the

table including chained cpi. if he would do that. they're like he has done that. it is up on the web site. isn't it up on the web site in bold? >> whitehouse.gov. >> the computer. we can use a computer. >> if it is not on fox it ain't news. >> you can't make -- >> stephanie: why the president can't make a deal with the republicans. it doesn't matter what he proposes. he's already compromised and compromised. what's honey boo-boo's -- it is a little prostitutey. what's her slogan? give me a dollar and -- >> i'll make you holler. >> stephanie: did she steal that from tone loc? >> tone loc requires $50. >> someone on the scale of honey boo-boo, it is just a doral. >> i heard she has something she called go-go juice like mountain dew. >> it is mountain dew and red

bull mixed together. >> how old is she? >> i think she's like 7. that's not good for her little body. >> stephanie: no. >> but it makes her perform well on stage at the child pageants. >> not good. >> stephanie: you're someone who generally does not enjoy children on the plane. >> but, you know -- >> stephanie: you told a beautiful story. >> i was on an airplane going to d.c. on friday night and there was a child who was nonstop talking, crying, laughing, just nonstop. i couldn't believe it. >> stephanie: i used to hate screaming baby airlines until i flew chatty toddler and it is worse because they don't breathe. >> i couldn't believe it. this child has so much energy. what is his dad doing here? is he not calming him down? i was having hateful thoughts. afterwards, i was standing next to his dad and his dad told me i have to make this round trip flight every two months because he has two months with me and two months with my mom. it was a lesson for me because

you don't know what anyone else was going through. he was being ripped away from his mom and going with his dad for two months. >> stephanie: what was in your thought bubble before that? what sort of thoughts? >> oh, i'm not saying. >> if only the plane had an ejection site. >> i was thinking it is good i don't have kids. >> stephanie: my story behind me, there was a father and a kid that was playing a banjo and i just -- turned around and gave him the international look of really? >> how can you play a banjo in coach? >> who brings a banjo on a plane? >> stephanie: i thought it was like -- >> banjo off -- >> stephanie: it was like the movie "airplane," you are [ bleep ] kidding me, seriously? >> was he going to sing "river of jordan." >> there is only one river. ♪ >> stephanie: really? i'm trying to read! >> i love children.

just not on airplanes. >> stephanie: it made me wish for screaming baby airlines because for something -- toddlers -- >> snakes. >> stephanie: i would say mother [ bleep ] snakes airlines. >> they're quiet at least except for rattlers. >> stephanie: stop that rattling. but there's something about toddlers, there is a lot of screaming when they're together and just a lot of nonstop -- they don't seem to need to breathe. it is like a kid joke. oh, my god! >> i had forgotten my little earphones. >> oh. >> noise canceling headphones. >> i had forgotten all of that. highway to hell. >> stephanie: we were talking about the first lady. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] how everybody freaked out. michelle obama said it was not surprising her satellite appearance at the academy awards provoked a national conversation. that was not a conversation. she said shoot my bangs set off

a national conversation. my shoes set off a national conversation. we've got a lot of talk going on. everybody's kitchen table conversation is accessible to everyone so there is a national conversation about anything. >> more like screaming goats than a conversation. >> stephanie: i think it is different, don't you think? it is not just -- i think she was talking about social media. there is awn precedented vit ray ol against her. have you met her? >> i have not met her. i've met the president but i have not met her. >> stephanie: she is just she seems. warm and funny and real. they freaked out over the mom dances. >> i love that mom dance. >> stephanie: what human being doesn't think it is cute? >> she's good! >> how dare she? who does she think she is? >> i thought she looked great in the mom dance. >> stephanie: it made me want to scream like a goat. we thought the screaming goats had jumped the shark but not until someone sent this. ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ [ screaming ]

♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ [ screaming ] ♪ i'm walkin' on sunshine ♪ [ screaming ] ♪ and it's time to feel good ♪ >> okay, that's my favorite one. >> stephanie: we'll use it on mondays after i watch david gregory. that will be my monday show up. 46 minutes after the hour. back with the remaining segments with hot brie in the city. >> announcer: her grade school nuns would like to slap her silly. it is the "the stephanie miller show." >> jack, how old are you? >> nine. >> this is what 27 tons of marijuana looks like. (vo) with award winning documentaries that take you inside the headlines, way inside. (vo) from the underworld, to the world of privilege. >> everyone in michael jackson's life was out to use him. (vo) no one brings you more documentaries that are real,

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♪ oh, yeah, oh, yeah ♪ >> stephanie miller. ♪ i've got stuff that you want, i've got the thing that you need ♪ ♪ i've got more than enough to

make you drop to your knees ♪ ♪ because i'm the queen of the night ♪ ♪ queen of the night ♪ ♪ oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah ♪ of>> stephanie: it is "the stephanie miller show." 51 minutes after the hour. 1-800-steph-12. actress melissa fitzgerald, act vest extraordinaire as we call her by her hot name hot brie. ♪ hot brie on with stephy ♪ ♪ hot brie on with stephy ♪ ♪ hot brie on with stephy ♪ >> stephanie: thank you rocky mountain mike. >> thank you rocky mountain mike! >> wow. >> stephanie: hot brie has moved very close to me and i'm going to help her unpack. >> did she do this on purpose? >> stephanie: no. >> or by accident. >> stephanie: i lured her in. i won the turf war with jacki.

>> the turf war. >> stephanie: i'm going to go bring a bottle of wine and help her unpack. she will be like why did you put my shoes in the freezer so then she'll need to have her actually help her unpack because i'll put everything in the wrong place. >> are you. you made me dinner last night. >> stephanie: i did. was it delicious? >> it was delicious. >> stephanie: i made her brown rice with chicken meatballs. >> it was like a meatball medley. different flavors. delicious. >> stephanie: thank you. then we screamed at david gregory together. >> perfect night. >> stephanie: well, not for me. >> goats screaming. [ buzzer ] >> into the penalty box with you. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: every time she comes in. but the good news is we did not fall into a sinkhole. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> oh, that was terrible. >> that is awful. >> stephanie: not a naked pillow fight. we did not fall into a sinkhole.

[ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> he was sleeping thursday night. still expanding jim, you were saying earlier. they've evacuated several houses near the one -- i thought nothing -- every horrible story that comes out of florida i'm like what? the whole took the entire bedroom. the bed the dresser everything was sinking. it says here sinkholes are a common occur nence central florida. >> because of limestone. >> the bedrock. this gets washed away easily. so whatever is on top of it just falls. >> i'm not going to live in florida. >> you would rather live here where we have earthquakes. >> absolutely. [ laughter ] >> stephanie: 40% less sinkholes in my neighborhood. >> actually, i'm going to florida in like a week and a half. i hope i don't fall into the sinkhole. >> stephanie: please do not fall into the sinkhole. [ ♪ "world news tonight" ♪ ] >> stephanie: republican news, fight, fight fight. conservative advocacy group call for growth has an effort to purge the g.o.p. of moderates

launching a new campaign. >> moderates in the g.o.p.? >> stephanie: primary my congressman.com is designed to raise awareness of republicans in name only. rhinos serving in safe republican seats. >> stephanie: yes, fight fight, fight! [ applause ] you've got all your life to live, all your love to give, don't let them take you for granted like that. go elsa, be free! >> this is how we'll never get anything done. if things like that keep happening. we as voters have to stand up for this. if we're complaining and saying nothing gets done in washington. we need to take a look at why. we're putting them in that position. >> stephanie: there is a piece we were talking about in "the washington post" where the president is putting a lot of effort into 2014. we keep hearing we can't do anything. it is gerrymandering, whatever. the white house obviously differs and so -- >> of course we can do everything. we have the vote. we can change it. we can do exactly what we want. but we have to -- participate. >> stephanie: look at the

voter suppression. people don't like losing a right that other americans have died for their right to vote. it is like people's reaction to what scalia said. the voting rights act isn't racial entime. -- entitlement. >> i can't believe that came out of his mouth. >> stephanie: we're wondering what he's going to say about the prop 8 case, something horribly offensive that will cause gaffes in the lawyer's lounge like it did this one. >> didn't want to know. >> stephanie: neff mind. i won't -- never mind, lie go there. >> try not to. >> go, there go there! >> don't encourage her! >> stephanie: i don't understand why [ bleep ] needs separate rights. >> what? >> tom in columbus, you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: hey there guys. housewarming gifts to melissa.

hey, i wanted to respond to the stories that you did in first hour that senator bill nelson with claire mccaskill wanted to sponsor a bill to reduce congress's pay in response to the sequestration. that is not possible under the constitution. the 27th amendment does not allow for changes in compensation of the current sitting congress. you can only raise or, in this case, lower the pay in the subsequent session of congress after an election. so i don't know if there would be pandering to voters so say we're going to do something really tough and make congress take it -- take it on the chin if we have to lay off federal employees. or whether they just don't know what they're doing. but it kind of frightens me that bill nelson is proposing this. >> stephanie: yeah well, i think they sense the frustration out there with them getting paid and other people losing their jobs and benefits. all right. jim, please do not get drunk and inadvertently blurt out melissa

fitzgerald's new address. [knock at door] >> she's not going to get threats. >> stephanie: can i help you unpack? can i help you unpack your unmentionables? hi it's from steph's chat room. hi! [ laughter ] >> stephanie: erin in iowa, you're on "the stephanie miller show." >> caller: good morning. how you all doing? >> stephanie: good. go ahead. >> caller: i would like to thank you for everyone helping to turn my morning around. i go the to hear a clip from the tangerine boner saying the democrats demanded the sequester. so this is what i'm screaming at the top of my lungs. how can obama or democrats be to blame for the sequester when there was a bill with 51 votes to dissolve the sequester and start over but mcconnell filibustered this? >> stephanie: even david gregory after his teeny tiny ones descended he did say you know, you p